A father’s tribute…
It may sound cliched (if you’re a parent it won’t), but the most magical day of my life was the day I held my newborn daughters in my hands. Yeah it’s hands, not arms… Both times, I was scared stiff and thought if I held them in my arms, they’d break..So I held them in my hands at arms length and looked at them, tears streaming down my face..
My elder one is now 14 (acts 22) and the younger one is 10 (acts 16), so you can imagine the trouble I am in.
And then, as they learned to eat, walk and quickly talk… I learned how to be a father. At first it was easy. They didn’t talk back.
At first they listened to me. Later, as time passed, they learned not to.
At first whatever they did in school was fine. Every test was a victory. As time passed, social mores started to play a role. We had to discuss performance. I had to learn to have those chats, and they had to learn to listen.
As time passed, they learned that when dad said “Beta, I want to talk to you” it was time to roll their eyes and give into another round of “Gyaan”.
I try hard all the time to be the kind of parent that can be seen as a friend. But it doesn’t always work out. It’s not easy to be the disciplinarian AND be a friend. Sometimes I make it work well. Other times I fail miserably.
They’re learning to be young adults, I am learning to be a friend.
A few years ago I tried to get them to call me by my given name. They said “Your name is Dad”, so I said “Then your name is Daughter” and that’s what I’ll call you. They just laughed at me and said “How will we know which one of us you’re calling” … Sigh.. they grow up too quick.
Earlier I used to win more arguments, now they’re the quick ones! I hate losing to anyone at anything, especially verbal repartee. But with my girls, I love to lose. It makes them happy, and just to see them grin or burst out into laughter when they get the better of me, makes my day.
They’re growing up now. Soon they will fall in love. Go through heartbreak. Get confused about their career-choices. Will go through the kind of pain I can’t help with. I will have to learn how to handle that. I don’t know yet, how I will. But I’m Dad, I’ll find a way.
- A Tribute to My Dad (attraversante.wordpress.com)